Heart of a Poet

The Star

2011-11-29T17:30:00.004-05:00

The Star
by: R.A. Slater
11/29/11

She traverses the horizon
Moving with a rhythm unknown
Sometimes she is the evening star
Giving light and guidance to the weary traveler
Other times she is the morning star
Greeting the early riser
Her brightness outshines all
Blazing long before night has fallen
Lingering in the dawn

No story

2011-11-28T20:12:00.001-05:00

No story
by: R.A. Slater
11/28/11

I sit with the paper
Snow white on the table before me
The pen I hold in my hand
Poised and ready
But nothing comes
There is only silence
Where words once flowed
Like water from the sky
But now there is not even a mist
The characters that once crowded my head
Are now frozen mid frame
Awaiting their next action, next sentence, next heartbeat
And I cannot give it to them
Their stories halted until a time I cannot see
How I long to tell stories again

I.D.I.C

2011-11-26T21:36:00.004-05:00

I.D.I.C
by: R.A. Slater

The Vulcan raised his eyebrow
To hear his captain's comment
About the good old days
When firing phasers at Klingons
Was the order of the day
No one questioned his decision
Or thought asking questions first
Would have been wiser
Let the fists fly
And let the blood flow
The price of peace in the good old days
Is not diplomacy better?
Asked the logical first officer
Peace without war, without blood?
They may be different from us
That does not make them the enemy
The tired old captain sighed
And said 'I suppose'
The Vulcan then realized
His friend was just tired
Of not being able to tell at a glance
Who the enemy really was
How could one be sure
When friends became foes
When the enemy wore the familiar uniform
Quietly the Vulcan put forth his argument
That it was not people that were the enemy
But hatred, fear, and insecurities
Instead of seeing Infinite Diversity
In Infinite Combinations
These insecure people saw only differences
And not the similarities
The common bond that knit all of life together
But the tired old captain could only agree
To hold his fire through the truce
Embrace them he could not
The Vulcan let it go
Seeing the beginning of the end
A small victory to be sure
But an avalanche could tip
At a snowflakes landing

Do You Remember?

2011-11-26T14:55:00.002-05:00

Do You Remember?
by: R.A. Slater
11/26/11

It seems just like yesterday
Gas was only $3.49 a gallon
And milk was not far off
Chocolate was only 75 cents
How prices have gone up!
They pay us less and less each year
And make the work harder
And longer!
Do you remember?
It seems just like yesterday
When you only had to wait an hour
To get from one side of town
To the other
Traffic has gotten so bad these days!
Do you remember?
It seems just like yesterday
Things were so easy
The grass was greener
Everything was cheaper
At least that is how
Our children of today
Will look back on these days
When our age they reach
And we in grayer caps
Will chuckle as history repeats
As the good old days are recalled

Blazing Glance

2011-11-25T17:50:00.002-05:00

Blazing Glance
by: R.A. Slater
11/25/11

God just glanced at me
Burning blazing fire
Racing across my bones
Searing my flesh
Hair standing on end
Just a look, just a touch
And all that I am
Known to Him
No hidden flaw
Secrets revealed
Yet there is no shame
Liquid gold coursing my veins
As He speaks my name
So similiar to my lover
The thrill, the warmth, the love
Passion and comfort

The Funeral

2011-11-24T09:06:00.001-05:00

The Funeral
by: R.A. Slater
11/24/11

We gather together
After so long apart
Scattered across the globe like confetti
Drawn together this day
For reasons we do not want
Bearing unspeakable pain
We hold our chins high
And link our arms together
Knowing that we are only a strong
As our weakest link
Whom we will not leave behind
Because family sticks together
Through thick and thin
Each taking a moment alone
We say goodbye
To a brother lost to us
Gone ahead on life’s next journey
But then we gather back together
Stronger together than alone

Hunted

2011-11-22T11:34:00.000-05:00

Hunted
by: R.A. Slater
11/19/11

Hard to be watched
No freedom to be had
When nothing wrong have I done
An hour of innocent fun
Misunderstood by his jealous heart
Love him I do, does he not know?
My heart is his and his alone!
Hunted I am, by his jealous eye
Haunted I am, by my need to be free
How long can I live this way?
When can I fly, free from his chains?
Only I can know,
Only I can set myself free,
When I have had enough,
And finally realize his love is not real.

written as a response to a Poetry a Day challenge

Bittersweet the Memories

2011-11-21T09:28:00.000-05:00

Bittersweet the Memories
by: R.A. Slater
11/19/11

Oh, brother of mine...
where did you go?
How can it be...
that you are gone from us?
There are no words...
to describe the pain inside...
it is too new and sharp.
Tears still flow from the shock...
from the gaping hole in our lives.
But memory remains...
as I hold the picture of you.

Ten of us gathered around our sire...
memories from a lifetime ago.
All the love, laughter, tears and drama...
that goes along with “Family”.
Each set of memories unique...
As the one who holds them.

How you were there when needed...
A strong arm in times of crisis.
Of winter holidays of cheer...
And summer picnics and slower days.
Always ready to lend a helping hand...
Rain, sleet, snow or shine.
How deeply you are missed already...
A treasure unredeemed.
How bittersweet the memories...
for they are all we have left.
How the good outweighs the bad...
to shine through this dark night.

Author's note: This poem is dedicated to the memory of my brother Glenn R. Slater who passed from this world into the next on October 31, 2011. I have a feeling there will be more to follow, because as the poem above states, it is all too new still. Indeed, almost a month later it still doesn't feel 'real'.

In the Night

2011-11-20T09:02:00.001-05:00

In the Night
by: R.A. Slater
Sound Bites Series
08/28/11

I still look for You in the night
In the silent stillness
Though it is dark now
In that place where Your face used to be
Though Your voice no longer calls to me
And Your sweet touch is but a memory
Still Your fragrance lingers on the edges
So I know You're not far
How long will You make me wait?
How long till You touch me again?
How long before Your voice is heard again?
In that place where You used to be?
My watch, my search, my longing continues

The Whisperings and the Thunderings

2011-11-19T08:59:00.001-05:00

The Whisperings and the Thunderings
by: R. A. Slater
06/25/11
Sound Bites Series #14

I hear a Voice in the stillness
And what You say to me leaves me in awe
Reminding me of promises of old
Of hearing Your Voice as thunder
But You tell me
The Whisperings and the Thunderings are the same
It is not You raising Your Voice that is different
It is my perception that changes
The clarity of my hearing
Becoming sharper as I listen in the silence

Vain Imaginations

2011-10-31T08:48:00.002-04:00

Vain Imaginations
By: R. A. Slater
06/16/11

The promises of God are “yes and amen”
But unless they are written in His Word
The whispers you think you hear
Are most likely vain imaginations
God never promised me home and hearth
Children playing at my feet
He never promised me fame or world acclaim
Or publishers clamoring for my next book
He never promised me a beautiful life
Free of thorn and thistle
They were vain assumptions I made
Thinking I heard His voice
When they were only my wants and desires
Hearing only what I wanted
Surely He has more important matters
Than one woman's broken heart over lost dreams
Fates of nations and leaders
The lost, the hungry, the ill
The broken, the abandoned and abused
Surely He is mad enough for adding to that number
As am I for wishing such a thing
Even though I believe a good mother I would be
He must think differently
For my womb is barren
As is my heart, empty and cold
Perhaps He has a grander plan
Or perhaps it's been delayed
But I cannot see it
Though I squint and strain
I cannot bare to hope anymore
For it only brings more pain
To keep hearing heaven's “No”
We can't all have our prayers answered “yes”
What a mess that would be
We can't all be Hannah
Some must walk the harder path
Though we stumble and fall
Sometimes becoming lost in the briars
One thing he HAS promised
In this we must trust
He promised never to leave nor forsake us
Even when we wander off
He remains by our side even then
Refusing to pick up a stone when we fall
Helping us to our feet instead
And giving us strength to go on

In Every Wretched Heartbeat

2011-10-26T13:00:00.001-04:00

In Every Wretched Heartbeat
by: R.A. Slater
06/10/11

Oh, wretched woman that I am
That such innocent beauty
Should cause me pain and heartache
Instead of the joy and wonder
She was meant to bestow
A tiny bundle sent into the world
But she is not mine
Another holds her
Tiny fingers curled tight
Dainty eyes closed in sleep
At peace with the world
Though it rages around her
I cannot help but long
For a bundle of my own
But I have long ago given up hope
It is not mine to have
It is not mine to hold
So I look on at others' joy
Trying not to show the pain
Making myself numb
Needing to be numb
I cannot feel this pain
Though it is all encompassing
In every breathe I draw
In every wretched heartbeat

Time Stands Still

2011-10-25T17:11:00.002-04:00

Time Stands Still
by: R.A. Slater
08/09/11

The clock hits 2pm
And time stands still
Dragging and drawing each moment out
As every man and woman “on the clock”
Waits for the tick to tock
Till they can punch the time card
And run out the door to blessed freedom
Free for a few hours
To play and to chore
Until the morning doth reappear
And once more they drag themselves
Kicking, screaming, resigned
Back into the den of servitude
For bills to pay
Families to feed
And toys to buy
An endless cycle
As sure as death and taxes

Hidden Prayer

2011-06-09T14:14:00.005-04:00

Hidden Prayer
by: R.A. Slater
06/09/11

Hide the bruises, ignore the pain
Pray it never happens again
They say I'm foolish to forgive
And naive to hope against the odds
But I pray on anyways
Ever wondering why
Why him, why me
Why the viscious circle
Had to cycle down to our generation
Let it die, let it end
Let it never happen again
Oh, Changer of hearts
Renew our spirits
Let Your grace and mercy flow in
Your blood was not shed for nothing
But for problems like these
Work Your "magic" in us
So all might see
And marvel at Your changing power
I pray on, in the hidden dark
Trusting that You can do all things
Like Your Word says

Perpetual Night

2011-06-04T06:53:00.001-04:00

Perpetual Night
by: R.A. Slater
06/02/2011

It took me by surprise
This dark night of the soul
There was no warning
It was just there
Day turned into night
Upon the horizon a faint light
Waxes and wanes
As the Full Moon darkens to New
Perpetual night never turning to day
You have set me here for a purpose
Of this my heart is sure
Though others mock and deride
For my failures here in this dark place
I trust in You alone
To forgive and understand
To shower Your grace and Your mercy
Strengthen me, I pray
And let this night once again turn to day

Crimson Stain

2011-06-02T15:22:00.005-04:00

Crimson Stain
by: R.A. Slater
06/02/2011

Another month passes
Crimson stains mar my vision
Another hope dashed
Another dream unraveled
My heart withers within
As the darkness deepens
No tears fall
They were spent
On this rocky shore long ago
And there is nothing left
Except ever increasing sorrow

In a Heartbeat

2011-01-29T11:44:00.003-05:00

In a Heartbeat
by: R.A. Slater
01/29/11
Sounds Bites Series #13

"Please Jesus"
In a heartbeat
No time for more
Danger too great
Pain too deep
Trusting You to see
Exactly what it is I need

Choices

2011-01-25T09:29:00.000-05:00

Choices
by: R.A. Slater
01/21/11

Do I follow?
This man I do not know
What might lay
On the path he takes?
Should I stay where I'm at?
Wander back the way I've come?
So many choices
Life has to offer
Risks and rewards
Which is greater
I must decide
And quickly too
Before the chance to follow
Is too late to take
As he gets farther and farther away
I must make my choice...

See pic at this post

Through the Window

2011-01-23T16:51:00.003-05:00

Through the Window
by: R.A. Slater
01/16/10

I open the shades to let light in
To look out and enjoy the view
Breathing in fresh air
Well aware that strangers come to peep
And peer through the window
That seems fair to me
Because they let me peep
Through their windows as well
Seeing so many things
Their hopes
My dreams
My trials
Their tribulations
The ups and downs of daily life
Shared by a family of strangers
Connected by a little web
Strengths and weaknesses
Balance each other out
Some more talented then others
But nothing held against another
Deep thoughts here
Poems there
Histroical trivia here
Mundane ventings there
So many ideas and thoughts
Myriad of subjects
All wrapped together
Weaving a story too big
For one person to tell
All are needed

Out of the Blue

2011-01-21T20:39:00.003-05:00

Out of the Blue
by: R.A. Slater
01/21/11

I was sitting on the side
Trying my best to be invisible
Ignored and forgotten
Feeling so sad and down
And then there You were
A ray of sunshine
Out of the blue
To shine happiness on me
You remembered me
And You wanted me to know
Just how much You thought of me
And just how much You loved me
You have not fogotten
And wanted me to know!

Distorted

2011-01-21T00:57:00.000-05:00

Distorted
by: R.A. Slater
01/16/11

I stand before the jagged mirror
Staring at the image it gives me
Looking through the lense
Of a different perspective
How can I ever be me
When all I see are other views
Distorted beyond recognition
Not as You see me
Which is crystal clear
Sharp clear lines and curves
Nothing highlighted
Niether flaw nor perfection
The whole picture
Of who I am
Help me gaze on You
To see myself clear
For all else is distorted
And self obsession

Picture here

Broken Silence 2

2011-01-19T08:19:00.003-05:00

Broken Silence
by: R.A. Slater
01/15/11

How quiet it was
This golden silence
That spoke magnitudes
If I had the ear to hear
But that is nearing its end
As you have promised
To break this spell
I've been under
That mortals call Writer's Block
Many do not understand
The terror of this
Faced with blank page
Equally blank mind
I could not have written
Anything but drivel
Though I did try
In vain it was
But the silence is ending
Thoughts and words and pictures
Flow through my mind without end
What sweet relief
As we meet again
This wonderful creativity
Some mortals do not understand
Because they have not had the joy
Of the broken silence
Because they never had the Voice
Whispering in their ear
In the first place

Geode

2011-01-17T10:55:00.002-05:00

Geode
by: R.A. Slater
01/12/11

It's all I have to give
A single beating heart
Full of hopes and dreams
Innocent in spite of it all

As You had created me
A spark in Your imagination
Not just another cog in Your design
But a rare and sparkling gem

Hidden beneath a scarred surface
Scorned and mocked by the world
For its lack of apparent beauty
It is a rare treasure

For this heart that beats within
Was formed in the secret place
Weaved together at Your delight
Beats for You above all else

My heart has been Yours
From the very beginning
Every dream and every hope
Putty in Your hands

Beautiful is what I am
Not because of what is outside
This beauty shines from within
Facets polished by Your hand

How I delight You!
In ways others can't see
I am Your daughter
And Oh, how You love me!

Who You Are

2011-01-15T04:35:00.001-05:00

Who You Are
by: R.A. Slater
01/06/11

You are great
In all You do
I need Your strength
To see me through
You are awesome
In Your power
The waves toss high
Knocking me down
But You lift me up again
You are the lifter
Of all the downtrodden
Of which I know I am
Ground down to dust
You shine Your light
Across my path
For I need Your help
To stay the course
There is none that compare
To the splendor of Your glory
You are God and none can compare
It is Your help that stays my course
Because that is Who You are

Dark Hour

2011-01-13T03:02:00.001-05:00

Dark Hour
by: R.A. Slater
07/30/00

In this dark hour
When light begins to fade
When friend turns to foe
And your every breath hurts
Remember the Lord God your Savior
For He bought you with his blood.

When all around you is as the unknown
Strangers are your only ally
On the long and arduous trip
Through the fire of refining
Remember the Lord God your Savior
For He also made a long and lonely trip.

When the walls of Jericho remain standing
With not even Rahab's scarlet rope hanging in the breeze
When the enemy gathers 'round
And flexes his imagined muscles
Praise the Lord God your Savior
And those walls will come tumbling don
The darkness will part, the light will shine
Praise Him with every breath and the pain will ease
And you will have the strength to go on.

When your hope dims and your heart withers within
When your strength fails and your faith is tested
When your dreams turn to dust that blows away with the wind
Or is stolen and derailed by the enemy
Do NOT despair, for your Restorer is near
The Lord God your Savior is your hope and your salvation
In Him is your hope, your strength, your joy
It is He who holds your dreams in the palm of His hand
It is His to decide whether to rid you of them for something else
Or to give them back once you've surrendered to Him
It is He who will enable your heart and your faith
To withstand the fires of trial
And to emerge victorious, stronger, bolder
Emblazoned with His glory
To shine in this dark hour
As a testimony to His goodness and mercy
To shine as a blazing torch to show the True Way
For all who are in darkness

Presbyter Experience

2011-01-06T08:49:00.001-05:00

Presbyter Experience
by: R.A. Slater
early 2001

Where are my words of triumph?
Where is my word of revelation?
Is there no confirmation of words past?
Do I not likewise have a vision,
And a future in this place?
Am I not also going to reach nations?
And not my books going to minister to millions?
Are not my hands and voice anointed as well?
Was my words lost in the shuffle?
Or just laid aside until a later time?
Does not God speak to me as well?
Does not His Holy Spirit bear witness to me?
Is not my heart His dwelling place?
The Word is my confirmation and comfort,
All else is secondary, though nice.
I will not doubt despair, too much,
When humans fail me.
For the Lord my God is here to stay.
Though I do not understand,
And will cry due to unmet expectations.
Yet I will trust Him, an expect Him
To have something better in store for me.

authors note: a Presbyter is when a church brings in a group of seasoned prophets for the express purpose of prophecying to the individuals in that church. Obviously, they ran out of time before they got to me his time and I was feeling somewhat discouraged.

O Lord, O God

2011-01-04T12:27:00.001-05:00

O Lord, O God
by: R.A. Slater
date unknown, early FB years.

How it did please You
When I broke forth from my pew
Though to man I did look absurd
You shook Your head at my human embarrassment
Knowing I could not see
Just how You did view me
The pureness of heart, the absolute glee
The freedom to dance, the courage to sing
All of heaven did cheer
As I Your child did discover
That I too could draw near
And dance into Your heart
Where forever I do belong
My hands did wave, and my heart did soar
O Lord, O God - how can this be?
How is it that this freedom has departed from me?
When did their standard come in
To be first above Yours?
As though others are my judge and jury
And You the referee!
How prideful can I be
To worry how my equals judge me
When You alone hold eternity?
How foolish I know I am
To look back on that moment, and all that have followed
And see the flaws, and the mistakes - through the eyes of Man
When none of that did You see
But the beauty of eyes fixed on You
And a heart that at that moment did feel
Every drop of love that You did shed for me
If only I could never forget
The pit that You did draw me out of
And the prison You set me free from
O Lord, O God, can I ever get back
The joy and the innocence that I have so foolishly lost?
Will I ever be so carefree
As that day when it was
That I first did break free?
Please create in me a newness of life
A newness of joy and peace
And renew the Spirit that You have placed within me
Mold me and make me
A woman after Your heart alone
Knowing that no matter what
You will always love me
Even as You convict and make new
This heart that had once forsaken You
I hear in my heart Your gentle voice
Telling me of the sureness of Your forgiveness
And of promises yet to be seen
Whispers of faith untold
And of greater promises to unfold
More dances to be danced, more songs to be sung
Greater joy to be had, a deeper peace to be known
Heaven's heights will become known
And Jesus, Your face I will see
Smiling and laughing with me
O Lord, O God, my heart does leap!

Let the Storm Rage

2011-01-03T11:49:00.000-05:00

Let the Storm Rage
by: R.A. Slater
date unknown, but it's from the same batch I just found, so it's old.

Let the storm rage
I am planted on a firm foundation.
Let the lightning strike and the thunder crash
For I know my Shelter will protect.
Let the waves wash over me
I shall not drown.
Let the winds blow
They may knock me down, but they will not blow me away.
Though I may quake and fail
His promises will endure.
He has promised to pick me up
When I fall down.
Though my heart shall fail and my soul faint
He has promised never to leave nor forsake.
Though my steps falter and wander
He is still there.
Though I cannot see Him
I know He holds me through the storm.
And when the tempest is through
I shall see things anew.
My eyes He will dry
And my heart He will revive.
He shall straighten my path
And light my way.
And when tomorrow brings a new storm
I will not fear.
I will trust Him
For I know no other way.

The Staircase

2011-01-01T11:06:00.000-05:00

The Staircase
by: R.A. Slater
early 2000's after the New Years Eve Church service/party

On and on it seems to stretch
*This staircase in my life
Of trials and tribulations, of challenges and growth
*That I alone can climb, must climb
Though the trip is wearying
*It is not in vain
For He is a promise-keeper
*His promises are 'yes and amen'
And He has promised great things
*Though I do not see them except in my mind's eye
From where I now stand
*The staircase appears to have no end
Though I know that this is an illusion
*Cast by my perspective
Could I look down and see my life
*From heaven's higher view
I would see things quite differently
*From what I see them to be while here on earth
Though granted revelations
*Of God and of my self
That often gives reprieve of my emotions
*I often live mment by moment
Often forgetting to even ask
*For those revelations
I grow so eary of this constant climbing
*This constant battle to be who I am meant to be
In such moments God will sometimes give
*A moment to rest, a moment to breathe, a moment to reflect
Sometimes we will sit in silence together
*Grateful for each other's presence
Sometimes I will weep for the emotion of the moment
*And His loving arms hold me in a tender embrace
That strenthens me and draws me nearer to Him
*And keeps me from falling off this staircase that grows ever steeper
Sometimes I will look back down the staircase
*And wonder at what I see
Although the memory of the past steps have been emblazoned in my heart and mind
*I see only a gradual incline behind me
Littered with gemstones of tears
*Made beautiful by His compassion
Littered with the torn down alters of my life
*Now an altar to Him and Him alone
Littered with cast aside burdens
*Burdens that ever prowl, awaiting a chance to reattach themselves
How I did fight, sometimes kicking and screaming
*To give up those things that stained my worship
And when I surrendered my will to His
*How I did wonder why I fought so hard
The path before me is steep
*As it always has been
And He alone knows how many times
*I have paused in moments of despair to gaze over the side of these stairs
And into the dark abyss
*Pondering dark thoughts of giving up
But as I listen to the quiet voice within and without
*I am filled with comfort and peace
For the voice of God does not condemn me for my weakness
*No, He reminds me that He is God, and He is good
That He has given we abundant life
*If I am willing to walk in it
That I am His child
*And nothing will ever take me from Him
That the heart of the cross did beat with love for me
*With all my foibles and follies, sin burdened and alone
And so, knowing beyond feeling, that hope remains
*I rise to my feet, repositioin my armor and continue the climb
Knowing that I do not climb alone
*For He often carries me
And that the heart of the cross
*Beats for me still

Reflections

2010-12-31T06:49:00.000-05:00

Reflections
by: R.A. Slater
12/31/00

Another year is gone, vanished like vapor
And another year is knocking at my door
As I try to decide how to greet this new year
I think on the past one and wonder -
What have I to show?
For this past year has had its share of joy,
And more than its share of sorrow.
There have been far more failures than I would like,
And too few successes.
Friends have been lost, some to the grave
And some friends are now enemies.
There are more gray hairs,
From too much stress, and too much worry,
Though there are some who say I have "the" life.
No spouse, no children or the bills that go with them,
Which translates as "You have no worries!"
How little they know! How little they suspect the truth of my life!
There are more scars to account for,
Both on my body and on my heart.
The left over marks on my hands either say I am not afraid of hard work,
Or that I am accident prone, or dare I say - clumsy.
The ones on my heart I'd rather ignore, for many of them still hurt and bleed.
But they are a part of who I am, and of who I am being molded into.
Yes, I am tender of heart and spirit
And I pray that I never become too hard.
For each of these scars are evident of God strengthening me
Through these strange and hurtful things.
He has tried me to my limit this past year,
And then asked me to stretch even further.
I thought that I would break into a thousand pieces.
With this in mind, I wonder if it is possible
To bar the door and fend off the new year?
I would that it could be possible to stop time in its track,
But then there would be no new mercies,
No new discoveries of the awesomeness of this God
Who allows me to call Him friend.
Even though He is the One who holds the entire universe
In the palm of one hand.
I would be safe if time were to stall, with nothing to hurt me,
But there would be no joy - only boring mundanity.
So come on in year 2001, have a seat and get comfy.
We'll drink some coffee and have a good Ol' time.
Bring on your trials and tribulations,
For God is in the fire with me
And I am determined to find joy amongst the thorns and the blood.
I will bear my sword and fight the good fight,
And if I should lose a battle,
Then I will heal to fight another day!
We will dance our dance and live our life and when we are through -
I will say goodbye to you as well, and welcome another new year.
Regrets I will wash away and the good I will cherish.
Bring on the good, the bad, and the ugly,
And the incidents that are curiously somewhere inbetween.
My response will be to bring out the big guns,
Verses like Jeremiah 29:11 and Deuteronomy 31:6
And not to forget Hewbrews 11:1 and 1 John 4:4
Psalm 150 has always been a good one,
So has Philippians 4:4-7
I will fling every verse above
And all the others that have been written
Into your face.
And, so, in the mean time - 2001 - bring it on!
The word says that I am armed and dangerous,
Therefore - of whom shall I be afraid?
Certainly not of you!
Perhaps, instead - you should tremble in fear of me.

Imagination

2010-12-30T18:52:00.003-05:00

Imagination
by: R.A. Slater
12/30/10

Out of my imagination flows
Vivid pictures of uncertainty
Lightning, hail, and rain
Fierce gales of the terrible tempest
Thunder crashing and rolling
Earth exploding and shaking
Chaos overthrowing order
Insanity reigning anew
Terror walking freely in the streets

Is this real, I wonder
Or the prodect of a bored imagination?
Could it be that I've watched too much rv?
Am I taking the bible too seriously
When it talks of wars-
And the rumors of wars
Marking the end days?
Regardless of the reality
They make for good poetry

I know not from whence they come
It really doesn't matter
So long as I can write them down
These crazy things I see and dream
For that is the best that I can do
Time will tell the truth of such things
It is not for me to judge
Only to relay the messages
Without censor or varnish

A Blessing For You

2010-12-30T08:59:00.000-05:00

A Blessing For You
by: R.A. Slater
sometime in 1997-1998, written for a friend when I heard he'd had a baby

May the God up above
Bless you hre down below
May He hear your prayers
And grant your requests.
May He grant you love and joy
That never fades with time.
May He embrace you with His love
And hold you close your whole life long.
May He fill you with happiness
And take away your sadness.
May the God up above
Be the One that lives in your heart.
May He forgive you your sins
So that you may be found Holy in His sight.
May He someday take you in His arms
And lift you up to live with Him on High.
May He guide you on your path
And may He stay at your side forever and always.
Amen.

Whose Vision Is This?

2010-12-28T11:26:00.000-05:00

Whose Vision Is This?
by: R.A. Slater
01/15/02
Written specifically for First Baptist Church, how differently I would write this poem today.

Is this my vision too?
Though it was first given
When I was but a child,
Only 4 or 5 years old
And no where near this church.
Can it be, that even then
My part in this church
Was somehow seen?
Am I willing to take part,
To make this my vision -
And not just the "church's" vision?
Am I willing to sacrifice
My time, my sweat, my prayers, my money
In order to see this vision come to be?
For we are not called to this church
Merely to be a spectator filling a spot in the pew
But to take our God-ordained place and do our part
For we are called here for a purpose!
Oh yes, many are called but few are chosen
But whose fault is that?
Are we willing to lay down our lives
To let the Holy Spirit work in our lives
In order to make us one of those "choice" individuals?
We must choose to answer the call
I know my answers to these questions,
"Yes Lord, Yes Lord, Yes Yes Lord Amen."
Do you know yours?

The Heart of Christmas

2010-12-26T09:53:00.001-05:00

The Heart of Christmas
by: R.A. Slater
date unknown, maybe Christmas 2002...I forget which Christmas poem I wrote for FB first.

The sound reverberated throughout heaven...
Such a small sound, so simple and quiet...
Yet the sound of mankind's first act of rebellion,
Was the sound of their doom.

Heaven whispered...
"What will He do now?"
"Will He destroy them and start over?"
"What is their fate now?"

But His heart could not be changed.
These were His creation
Made by His hands, by His breath they lived...
He could not destroy them - they were His own.

He had given them the ability to make their own decisions
For what kind of worship is it, if it is forced and mindless?
They had chosen the wrong way, sin had crept in and been given room
But now He would offer them another choice.

Into the Garden He went
At His regular time
And Man's absence was keeny felt as He cried out,
"Where are you?"

His heart continued to break
He gave them chances to confess their wrong
Instead they passed the blaim
And never took responsibility for their own actions

Judgment came and the curse was pronounced
But not before the unexpected Promise was spoken - the promise of a Savior
Another choice that if they took
Would reconcile them to His presence

It was the longing ache of God's heart
That gave us the Virgin Birth
Christ born in a manger
The long awaited promise became flesh

Jesus lived His life upon this earth
He walked among us and He was one of us
Fully Man and fully God
And it was His love that led Him to the Cross

His love for a wayward people
Many who wandered aimlessly through this life
Some who had no names and were invisible
Many who were the worthless scum of society

People whom the manifest presence of God
Was just a story told of the past from time out of mind
All of these He died for...to show them their great worth
That the God who created them wanted them back

The heart of Christmas
Is the heart of the Cross
It is the heart of the Creator
Desperate for His creation

For it is the name of Jesus, the name above all names
That reconciles us to His presence
He is the One who gives us life and hope
Where before there was death and despair

Do not turn away from the reason for this season
Do not hide yourselves in fear or pride
Do not attempt heaven on your own power
Do not look askance as if there were strings attached

We are the created, and we rebelled against our Creator
And instead of destroying us absolutely
He has given us a second choice
To accept the Christmas gift of the Cross

His only desire is to have us restored!
To be back in His presence, never to leave!
He longs for us with a passion
Far greater than we long for Him

Can't you hear Him calling?
"Where are you?" He cries out...
He knows our names as surely as He knew Adam's
"Where are you...I love you..."

The Christmas Miracle

2010-12-25T08:52:00.001-05:00

The Christmas Miracle
by: R.A. Slater
Christmas 2001

Our God is a God of miracles
From the opening words of the Bible, He makes this very clear
He spoke - and the universe came into existence
He spoke - and the world was formed
He spoke - and this world was filled with plants and animals
With His hands He formed the first man
And the first breath that was breathed was the breath of God.

He could have stopped after that last day of creation - but He didn't
He could have stuck with the small everyday miracles
The ones of keeping the world in its orbit and the rising of the sun
But our God does not do that
With only 100 years warning, the earth was covered with flood waters
An act of judgement, yes - but no small miracle
With a thought our one language became many languages
Fire fell on Sodom and Gomorrah and a woman was turned into a pillar of salt
The miracle of Isaac is well known
Israel saw miracle after miracle in the desert - and still they turned away
Water parting and enemies defeated and the sun standing still
All this and more to show the mighty hand of God

And yet the thought of the Christmas Miracle
Far exceeds anything He'd done before
How could God pour Himself into a human shell?
Our bodies are so fragile, so unprotected from accident - a baby more so
Prone to illness and infirmity
Muddy clay was expected to hold the Son of God
The most amazing part of the Christ Child being born
Is that He was born to die

Some would like to seperate Christmas and Easter as two different miracles
They happened on opposite ends of His life here on Earth
And even happened at different times of the year
But aren't they one and the same?
A miracle spanning 33 years?
The effects of which we are still seeing today?
For His purpose even at birth was the cross
He walked this earth as one of us
He spoke to us, taught us, tried to reach our stubborn hearts
There was no other way to bring us home
Than for Him to hang on the cross

Upon this One that was born outside of sin and was sinless in every way
Was poured every manner of sin and foulness that did not belong to Him
So that you and I could be free from sin and live in victory
Heaven's glory He left for us
And the One who was blameless
Upon Him the Father could not look
So that upon us He could look - and see no sin
My freedom and yours was bought at a price
Blood that poured down from hands and feet and side
Was actually poured out from Christ's own love
And all this started in manger
With a baby born from above
This salvation I have received
Heaven's own bright, morning star
Is the Christmas miracle

A Love Letter To God

2010-12-23T13:00:00.000-05:00

A Love Letter To God
by: R.A. Slater
06/11/01

My love is not enough, it is not deep enough nor real enough
When compared to the love of My God, my Jesus who died for me

It is no longer enough to say the words, "I love you."
And only mean it on the surface level
For I mean to love You with all that I am,
With a true love that runs to the deepest, most secret hidden part of me
I want to love You with an all encompassing love
That far exeeds anything I've ever experienced.
I want to love You far deeper than any love
I've ever claimed to have.
I want to fall in love with You, My God and King
Head over heals, helplessly in love with You.
I want to wake up eagerly, looking for Your smile
Anticipating Your presence in my day.
I want to fall asleep reluctantly, still immersed in Your presence
Immersed in the glory and the power of my God.
I want to dance with You, not only in wild delight
At the joyful remembrance of Your deliverance of me.
But also the slow intimante dance,
That belongs to lovers.
Where there is no shame or hindrances,
Only the sure acceptance of unconditional love.
Where there is no fear of abandonment,
Only the security that comes from promises kept.
I want You in every part of my life,
For You are the One that gave life to me.
I want to come to know You,
As deeply as You know me.
I want to swim deeper in the love You have for me,
And abandon my fear of drowning...
To lose myself along the way,
And be completely one with You,
Where words are no longer necessary,
And the only song there is -
- Is our hearts beating as one...

Limbo

2010-12-21T08:29:00.002-05:00

Limbo
by: R.A. Slater
sometime in 1999 or 2000

I'm stuck in the middle
Too old to be young
Too young to be old
Too young to be a leader
Too old to be taught forever
I'm not sure how to act
Someone always tells me I don't behave
Or that I'm not appropriate or behooving
My wrongs are highlighted before my rights
My accomplishments are too small for anyone to care
Who I am meant to be is clear to me
As impossible as it may seem, though mankind is opposed

"Dress this way, Don't wear that,
Your hair is too long, It is too short,
Walk this way, go that way, Stay out of my way,
Stand over here, Sit down and be quiet,
I love you, I hate you
Come talk to me, Don't talk to me!
March to the beat of your own drummer, Be like me!
Don't address the assembly, Come and testify!
Shoot for the stars, Don't dare to dream!
Your dreams are foolish, You'll never succeed,
You'll never be anything different from what you've been,
Change, change, change! You are no good!
You expect to little, You expect too much."
There is no inbetween, but that is where I'm stuck
I'm stuck in non-existance, told to leave, told to stay

God tells me something different, so I will not doubt
He tells me I am holy, and righteous
Set apart and chosen by Him
He tells me I am precious, special and unique
He tells me He is going to raise me up as a testimony to others,
Though I do not know how He means to do so, or truly what it means
I want so much for my dreams to come true
I want so much for them not to be vain imaginations
Who am I to lead? I am not qualified or worthy,
They will see only me, and not the One who sent me
But who am I to doubt my Savior's word?
I am only to obey
There is a saying,
"God doesn't call the qualified, He qualified the called."
In that I qualify, for I have heard His voice calling me

He will lead me out, He will be my qualification, He won't confuse me
He will set me free from this limbo so I might be who I was meant to be
He doesn't ignore, condemn, or turn away
His words are trustworthy and true
He will never leave me nor forsake me, never hang me out to dry
He will not fail me or ever tell me a lie
Though in this life I am stuck inbetween,
There is no doubt of eternity
He will see me through and I will break through
Break through the soapscum of sinful humanity
Break through the misgivings of saved humanity
Break through the mistreatment of them all
I will not doubt, I will not give up
Because my Savior has faith in me
He never has, nor ever will, give up on me.

Every Breath

2010-12-19T08:18:00.001-05:00

Every Breath
by: R.A. Slater
07/11/01

When every breath hurts
When evert thought stabs
He shared your pain
When the pain is beyond words
When your can't form the prayer
He still hears you
Your thoughts are no secret
Your emotions no surprise
He knows them all
Your troubles are not too big for Him
Your burdens are not to heavy for Him to carry
He holds the universe in His hand
Your troubles are not to small for Him to notice
Your burdens are not to trivial for Him to care
He loves you too much not to notice or care

Every breath counts and words are not necessary
He knows your heart - - He created you
Troubles and burdens are His specialty
He wants you to give them to Him
He will carry you
He wants you to lean on Him
He will be your strength when you have no other
He just wants you
And He will be your God.

Between Me and Thee

2010-12-17T17:24:00.007-05:00

Between Me and Thee
by: R.A. Slater
07/11/01

The spectators of this 'sport' look on and laugh
All they see is a spectacle of a woman
The super spiritual look sown their noses in keen disapproval
They declare it is nothing but an expression of the flesh by just one look
Still others look on in wonder
As they cannot see why I dance
They do not hear the song in the silence
And they do not hear the beat of the angels' wings
They cannot feel my joy at His very presence
They do not share in my jubilee
They do not realize the price that has been paid for my freedom
They do not know of my recent victories
They are content to sit and wonder as others laugh
Unwilling to listen to the testimonies I tell
"Crazy!" They all claim. "Foolishness!"
"It is the flesh!" They do declare. "She is delirious!"
"Why dance when there is no music?"

If only they were to walk a mile in my shoes
They would wonder no more
If only they could hear the music
Then they would dance with the angels
If only they knew the pain they unwittingly inflict
For they do not know who overhears their whispers
Let the mockers mock, let the pharisees scold
Let the wonderers wonder, let the watchers watch
For one day they too shall be judged
And they will learn what I already know
That Man's opinion is jaded
And not important in Eternity's eyes
That worship is between the worshipper and the One worshipped
Between the Father and me, between them and Him
For in the Last Day we will stand on our own
We are accountable for our actions alone
No longer can we claim that another distracted us
Or held us back from this treasure or that
For in the end, we are our own distraction
And we hold ourselves back

Books!

2010-12-07T11:40:00.003-05:00

Books!
by: R.A. Slater
12/04/10

What treasure!
What joy!
Pure elation!
Wealth hidden between two covers
Waiting for me to discover
The depths within
In the pages of books
Some old friends to be visited
Memories of last time
New nuggets to be found
Each a brave new world
Meant to be explored

What Secrets Lay

2010-12-05T08:04:00.001-05:00

What Secrets Lay
by: R.A. Slater
12/02/10

Behind dead eyes
What secrets lay
Stories untold
Of innocence betrayed
And love denied
Hopes shattered
Dreams unraveled
Freedoms stolen
Joy placed in a cage
Battered and beaten
Bruises on the heart
Easier to hide
Harder to prove
Greater shame
Over such silliness

City On A Hill

2010-12-03T08:25:00.002-05:00

City On A Hill
by: R.A. Slater
11/27/10
Sounds Bites Series #12

Darkness gathers 'round
Snowy clouds of fury
Bearing down with heavy gloom
Until a shaft of light
Shows a briliant center
A shining city on a hill
Mighty bulwark against the storm
Refuge of hope in desperate times

authors note: this was written after driving around a bend in the highway and seeing the shining city of Syracuse, NY against the dark backdrop of storm clouds.

Ripples

2010-12-01T17:15:00.002-05:00

Ripples
by: R.A. Slater
11/27/10
Sound Bites Series #11

Like a pebble in a pond
A raindrop in a puddle
So are your words to me
They might be small
These little poems
But their ripple effects
Rip all the way through
A mushroom cloud to consume me
Most likely meaningless to strangers
To me they are precious gems
I share them anyway
Knowing Your ripples
Stretch far beyond me

Pearls and Pebbles

2010-11-23T08:48:00.003-05:00

Pearls and Pebbles
by R.A. SLater
11/20/10
Sound Bites Series #10

Pearls and pebbles
Such are these poems
Tiny, but not insignifigant
Your Words to me
Are precious to me
Like the pebbles I gathered as a child
Unique and beautiful
Kept in a jar
For safe keeping
Displayed here for the world to see
Praises strung together
Like pearls on a string
For Your adornmant
So that all might know
The wonder of You

Shelter

2010-11-21T10:19:00.001-05:00

Shelter
by: R.A. Slater
11/17/10
Sound Bites series #9

Not all storms are from You
Not all are showers of blessings
Happiness and joy
Some are ordinary storms of life
Fraught with surprise
Pain and despair
But You see me through them all
My refuge and shelter
In the pouring rain

Blaze

2010-11-19T10:22:00.001-05:00

Blaze
by: R.A. Slater
11/17/10
Sound Bites Series #8

Your glory flashes before my eyes
As a star blazes through the heavens
Quickly and teasingly
You tantalize me
Delighted and delirious
I look for more
I long for more
So I keep looking
Knowing that You'll be there
As much in the waiting

Torrent

2010-11-17T08:12:00.001-05:00

Torrent
by: R.A. Slater
11-06-10

The tap was dry
Crusted over with rust
Where once life flowed freely
I tried many times
To turn the flow back on
Not the barest hint of a drop
Could be seen
Even on a rainy day
I sat patiently
I paced back and forth
Then finally lay down to die
The You spoke through the rain
And the tap began to drip
I sat up and paid attention
As one drip led to another
Then there was a steady stream to drink from
Slowly saturating all that could be seen
Long had I been awaiting this day
You promised me more
Not a whisper, a thundering
Soon there would be a torrent
A rush from heaven that no bucket could hold
I could not contain
But not a drop would not be lost
What wonders I anticipate!

Cotton Ball

2010-11-15T08:30:00.002-05:00

Cotton ball
by: R.A. Slater
11-05-10
Sound Bites Series #7

Such a little simple thing
This fluffy ball of cotton
Yet what memories it holds
A picture of sweet innocence
Gluing cotton to paper
To make a little lamb
Standing at Jesus' feet
Pure belief at His love
Peace in a little girl's sadness
However fleeting, however eternal
Shaping an entire life
Beyond what her little eyes can see
For her life is just beginning
Her faith newly planted
Seeded by a simple cotton ball
Given to her by faithful servants
What will blossom in time
Was foreseen long ago

Swarm

2010-11-13T07:09:00.002-05:00

Swarm
by R.A. Slater
11-4-10

There was no warning
No sounds of an advancing fleet
Not even a whisper on the wind
One moment the sky was clear
The sun was shining
Through fluffy white clouds
And then they were there
Buzzing, hovering, weaving
Swarming the earth like locusts
Invoking fear and awe
Causing much trembling
Wondering and confusion
A breath taking moment
Where time was suspended
Such beauty in the terror
The orchestration of the enemy
How they weaved in and out of each other
Never once colliding
But it did not change the fact
That we were under attack
As time resumed
And they rained fire from the sky
Showing no mercy or remorse
Seeking only death and destruction

Words Unspoken

2010-11-11T12:57:00.001-05:00

Words Unspoken
by: R.A. Slater
10-24-10

I hear the words you mean to say
Left unspoken in your voice
Words of regret and sorrow
Over the pain you inflicted
Actions you wish undone
Shock at your own failure

How I wish you would speak them
Ease the hurt in my soul
Cause the ache in my heart to cease
It would calm my fears
And be a balm to the wounds
Healing them quickly

Does it pain you much
To hold it inside
Instead of swallowing your pride
And voicing the emotions
You cannot hide
Though you try

I hear the words unspoken
And heal with them alone
Though I sometimes wonder
What words I miss hearing
Emotions I do not see
Can be dangerous

Let me in your world
Inside your heart
Won't you include me
Clue me into your thoughts
Instead of leaving me wondering
At words unspoken

Poetic License

2010-11-09T04:38:00.001-05:00

This isn't a poem per se, but it is poetic. Again, F. B. era and no specific date, though this one was written early 2000's.

Picture if you will, a woman dressed in white. A brilliant white dress, made of floofy material, with a royal look to it [it's got some sparkles in it too]. She is on her knees, face turned toward heaven. Something has hurt her, for there are silent tears streaming down her face...and her heart is in her hands, which are also lifted to heaven. The heart is not whole, it is torn and shred...blood flowing down her forearms. In her pain, she turns to the only One who's ever been able to help her before.

Not a word is said...as from heaven...reaching down...Nail pierced hands...strong...gentle. Not taking the heart, but taking the whole woman..blood, tears, brokenness and all. Holding her. Healing her...not by a show of power, not with a wave of His hand...but by His "mere" presence, by His love for her.

He places the heart back where it belongs...she doesn't need a new one, this is the new one she received long ago...Holding it in place with His hand...it is healed. She rests in the cradle of His palm...and knows no fear...for she's in her Daddy's hands.

No Title

2010-11-07T08:50:00.000-05:00

No Title
by: R.A. Slater
Circa 1998-2006 (again, something written during the First Baptist years that I have no date for!)

I have been forged in Fire, born again in Blood and Spirit
Been made strong through fire and water
As silver is refined so too has my soul been through the crucible
Like liquid gold Ihave been poured out before the Lord
Impurities He has scooped out with a net
And not a drop of glory was lost
As the blacksmith tempers his iron and steel with fire and water
So too has my heart been tempered
As clay on the potter's wheel, molded and crafted
His hands have been at work in me
And I have felt the heat of the kiln

I am so tired and weary
As I wonder if this work will ever be done
For it seems that as soon as one aspect is over
I find that I have just begun with another
When I have barely cooled from the fire of the blacksmith
I find myself in the crucible
When I think I am done in the crucible
I find myself on the potter's wheel
It seems as though I have reached the finish line
To find that I have only just begun to run the race
I do not know whether I have run before He was finished
Or whether there is more to do than I realized
Imperfections galore, I wonder if there is anything precious within me
Hiw word does say so, but I seem woefully lacking
Changes to be made for the better
Is there anything that can go untouched?

I am feeling quite attacked
By those who should be my defenders
Perhaps that is how the patient feels
When the doctor wields the scalpel
But right now I am in no mood
For metaphor and simile
I hurt and don't know why
I ache and cannot find the source
I am depressed and can't find the air pump!
The sliver is wedged in deep and all the flesh around it is tender
Which is where everyone wants to probe
It feels as though I am losing too much blood
And everyone insists that we continue to operate
And woe is me -
Despite my words
I just used a metaphor and a simile!
Is there no mercy? :)
If it weren't so sad, I would laugh
If it weren't so funny, I would cry
But it seems I can do neither

"You, who have shown me great and severe troubles,
Shall revive me again,
And bring me up again from the depths of the earth.
You shall increase my greatness,
And comfort me on every side." Psalm 71:20-21

Hope Whispers

2010-11-05T17:51:00.001-04:00

Hope Whispers, Hope Thunders
by: R.A. Slater
11-05-10

There you were
Sitting in the darkness
Thinking you were all alone
Ready to give up hope
And all done in
I could not, would not stop Myself
From reaching out to you
To show you My love
Wrap My arms around you
So I sent you a ray of sunshine
Light streaming through the rain
And gave you My sign
A promise to hold onto
When you are tired and weary
Oh My child, never give up
Hang onto hope!
Hang onto My promises!
You are not forsaken
Nor are you lost to me!
I hold you in My hand
I perform wonders for you
That no one else can see
You trained your eye long ago
To see Me when it is darkest
Look now, and you will see
Such glory and beauty
Lost to all others
You long to hear My whisper
As you did once
Pause and be silent, unsurprised
For you will hear My thunderings!
I have just begun My work in you
Through you, for you, beyond you
Hear My roar!

Them There Bones

2010-11-04T13:28:00.000-04:00

Them There Bones
by: R.A. Slater
circa: 1998-2007 - Written when my previous church was big into the Valley of Dry bones in the book of Ezekiel...chapter 37. Like the other poem, I have no idea when it was exactly written. just sometimes during the 1st Baptist church years.

Them there bones are dry and weary,
Cast into the fiery desert for an unknown purpose
Naked and brittle, broken and scattered,
They are the most wretched sight to be seen
Surely they are useless, with only decay in their future,
If they thought to rise and walk, no doubt they would fail
Dry and naked, surely they would creak, squeak and groan
And if the wind were to rise and give a gentle breeze,
They would most certainly collapse with a great rattle
And yet . . . we're not to give up on them there bones
For God has had much to say about these here bones,
For these here bones are you and I
Cast in the wilderness, but not forgotten
Not forever useless as we are being forged
Promises proclaimed and a hopeful future assured
These bones that have been scattered, He has promised to rebuild
These bones that are naked, He has promised to clothe in flesh again
These bones that He has broken, He has promised to mend, better than before
Thses bones that are brittle, He has promised to strengthen
These bones that squeak as if rusty, He has promised His oil for them
These bones that are dry and dead, He has promised to revive them in His waters
All His promises are true, they are "yes" and "amen"
These here bones are going to have the breath of life breahted into them
Once more to live, once more to prophesy, once more to praise
The very breath of God, an all consuming fire
Shall revive these here bones, and give new life and purpose to them
They shall rise to danec again, and perchance to dance
No longer shall they rattle in the wind,
They shall breathe it in, the breath of God

Rhyme Time

2010-11-03T13:00:00.000-04:00

Rhyme Time
by: R.A. Slater
circa 2001-2006 (Sometime during the middle First Baptist years)

Here's a poem for ya
I hope it doesn't bore ya

No, no - that was it
Ah! I quit!

Do you think I can compose
Just on your say so?

So that didn't rhyme
It was close enough this time

Ah! Enough is enough
I'm tired of this stuff!

Go home, go to bed
Make sure the dog has been fed

Goodnight!
Don't forget to turn out the light!

Leaching Sadness

2010-11-01T14:35:00.002-04:00

Leaching Sadness
by R.A. Slater
08-30-10

There is a sadness
Running down deep
With far reaching tentacles
Spreading without reason
Without cause
Its poisonous lethargy
Sapping away my strength
Robbing me of all joy
Siphoning hope away
Reaching in from the outside
Its insidious presence leaching into my bones

Obsession

2010-10-30T14:49:00.001-04:00

Obsession
by: R.A. Slater
07-22-10

I can't help myself
As I stand beneath
Your glorious canopy
Stretching as far as the eye can see
In every direction
I am obsessed with Your heavens
Billowing clouds in cotton hues
Golden rays of bloodshot sunsets
Starlit glimmers in the dark of night
Oh but looking is not enough
I must set these visions for all eternity
Picture after picture I snap
To keep the rembrances
Of Your glory
Close at hand
One never being enough
Always needing just one more
One more moment frozen in time
Memory forever in my hand

Shepherd's Voice

2010-10-28T14:07:00.002-04:00

Shepherd's Voice
by: R.A. Slater
08-05-10
Sound Bites Series #5

Strange the dreams we dream
Of a little lamb
Struggling to break free
To escape the mucky pen
And frolic in fields of grace
Amidst the flowers and butterflies
Racing through the green grass
Chasing the clouds tail
Following the Shepherd's Voice
As He calls to her
Above the buzzing bees
And His arms embrace her

Having Faith

2010-10-26T13:42:00.002-04:00

Having Faith
by R.A. Slater
07-26-10
Sound Bites Series #4

Sometimes having faith is as simple
As putting pen to paper
Watching the words flow
From it's rapidly moving tip
Rushing to set the sudden torrent
On paper as in stone
Stories of troubles heroes
Struggling to live and love
Poems of beauty and ashes
Torn from a tormented soul.

Other times faith is hard
Sitting for hours on end
Pen pressed to paper
Hard enough to leave a deep ink spot
Waiting for words to come
And hearing only silence
Wondering at the next leg
Of the wandering heroes' journey
Awaiting the next expression
Of a lonely soul's longing
Knowing the waiting is not in vain

Static

2010-10-24T13:03:00.006-04:00

Static
by R.A. Slater
08-19-10
Sound Bites Series #6

Here I sit in the quiet
Straining to hear Your Voice
Where it used to be
But all I get are bits and pieces
Intermittent sound bites
In the constant buzzing static
Like too many bees
On a quiet summers eve
Broken only when they pause
To sip the flowers sweet nectar
Allowing me to do the same
As I drink in every one
Of Your sound bites to me
Messages through the static of life.

Desert Winds

2010-07-30T14:00:00.000-04:00

Sound Bites Series #3
Desert Winds
by: R.A. Slater
07-30-10

Each step a struggle
The desert winds wash over me
Looking across the desolate landscape
I wonder if this is my lot in life
To be trapped in this desert
Wandering forever in circles
Never finding an oasis
To revive this broken heart
Nor the way out
To the long ago promises
Whispered in my ear
Hot and biting
I let the desert winds scour me
As I trod on

I Was There

2010-07-21T16:00:00.000-04:00

I Was There
by: R.A. Slater
07-21-10

I was there that day
In that moment
When the world ended
And insanity began
I felt the rain
The warm pounding of flesh
Smelled the wet earth
As dust was driven down
Heard the pounding thunder
As the sky was split
And Heaven's fury rained down
I remember the tossing
The trembling of the earth
Holding on for dear life
Praying for the end
For the changes to cease
Waiting on reality to return
Though a new one was being written
Before my very eyes

Quiet

2010-07-11T05:49:00.003-04:00

Sound Bites Series #2
"Quiet"
by R.A. Slater

They say that in the quiet
In the stillness of the moment
You are there
And Your voice can be heard
But in this quiet that I live in
All I seem to hear
Is the sound of my own breathing
I take comfort remembering other times
When this moment was filled
With glorious You
And knowing that You have not left

Empty Spot

2010-07-05T17:20:00.001-04:00

Sounds Bites Series #1
Empty Spot
07/02/10
by: R.A. Slater

Deep inside
There is an empty spot
Where words used to be
Flowing from my pen
Describing deep despair
And things of great joy
Now I listen in vain
For all I hear is stillness
But I listen anyway

Chocolate

2010-06-05T22:00:00.005-04:00

Chocolate
by R.A. Slater
06-05-10

Your allure is irresistible
Calling out to me when I am lonesome
You do not fill the void
Your companionship does not replace his
But instead makes it easier to bear
When he is absent from me
You whisper sweet nothings in my ear
Though it is poison to my veins
Your caresses are such comfort
For as long as they last
You are at once my friend and my foe
A bittersweet enemy

Desert Wind

2009-08-15T13:35:00.005-04:00

Desert Wind
by: R.A. Slater
08-15-09

Standing in the midst of this vast desert
I swallow my fear and loneliness
Reminding myself all the reasons
Why there is nothing to fear
And that I am never truly alone

The howling desert wind is mocking
Trying to distract me
Telling me the many reasons to fear
And asking me where this God is
That I am never alone

In truth, I have wondered this myself
He who walked so close
Now seems so far and distant
I have looked for Him and called His name
But all I hear are echoes

I draw my cloak around me
Not knowing if it is a cloak of light or despair
Regardless it keeps the scouring sand
Away from me and protects all that is delicate
All that is precious

Or is it?
Is it as precious as I think?
Or has this wind been sent by God
To scour away the very things
That hinder His answer?

I will never know
Unless I let down my defenses
And let the wind batter me
Let the sand scour me
And strip it all away

It could work that way
Or it could be
That the wind is lying to me
As it mocks and jabs
Every chance it gets

So I will continue to wait
And to wander in the direction He set
Until I find an answer
To draw deeper in my cloak
Or shed it and let the scouring begin

It is a thing of faith
A leap to take, either way
I could be wrong, I could be right
But I know that He is still faithful
And can make even my mistakes into something beautiful

For my mistakes, fumbling, and sins
Are not the end of me
Nor are they beyond something He can handle
In fact, they do not surprise Him
And were planned for long ago

And taken care of before I was born
No matter how hard the enemy tries
He can not take that Cross away
Nor the blood that covers me
And makes me whole

So I trudge on
Trusting in Him I cannot see
Believing He is still there
Hoping He is still with me
Carrying me

All I Have Left

2009-08-10T02:07:00.000-04:00

written 08-09-0, 2AM

All I Have Left
by: R.A. Slater

There it is once again
That popular song on the radio
Urging me to give it all
To quit living as one going through the motions
Instead to live with zeal and passion
So I don't end up asking
"What if" for the rest of my life

I long to ask the singer
What do you do when you gave it all
And there's nothing left to give?
I poured it all out
Gave until it hurt
My heart, my soul, my talents
But I was stupid and let men get in the way
Let them steal and belittle
All that I had to give to God

And now all I have left to give
Is this nothingness I feel
Which is far better than the pain
That plagued me night and day
All I have left to give
Is this emptiness within
Hoping that He can turn it
Into something beautiful
Like a flower blooming in the desert
For only He can take nothing
And turn it into something

The song I'm referring to is "Motions" by Matthew West.

Idle Worship

2009-07-02T09:00:00.001-04:00

This one comes from April 2004.

Idle Worship
By: R.A. Slater

Sing me a song
And I’ll go along
.....As into the throne room we go

But don’t ask me to help
I’ll be sure to yelp
.....And proclaim that it’s just not fair

I won’t go into the river
For all the world’s silver
.....If the water is too hot

All the finest gold
Won’t help if the river’s cold
.....I prefer it to be lukewarm

Won’t you give me a break?
For I’ve had such a hard week
.....And I think it’s time to eat

I’m much too tired
To feel on fire
.....Let me go home and take my nap

It is no wonder why
Things in life go awry
.....And God remains silent

We have no time
But think it’s no crime
.....Until He has no time for us

We have such passion and zeal
For something unreal
.....While the Lord is ignored

If we worshipped our Lord
As we do our idols
.....How He would draw near!

A Holy Spirit Stirring

2009-06-30T13:00:00.001-04:00

This is a Christmas poem I wrote for our church's Christmas program...outside of that setting I'm not sure if it's a good poem, but I'm posting it anyways because that's what I do! Date would be December 2004.

A Holy Spirit Stirring
By: R.A. Slater

Twas the night before Christmas
And all through the church
First Baptist and others
There was a great stirring going on.

The church had grown weary
And was setting in to take a long winters nap
She’d taken off her robe and made up the bed
And as she slid out of her slippers…there arose such a clatter!

The noise shook the church way down deep
For it had the sound of a mighty rushing wind
Surely, surely, it could not be HE
Thought the church as she put her slippers back on.

But before she could take a step
There He stood before her!
The Holy Ghost of God, arrayed in splendor
His countenance lighting the entire chamber.

She could scarce take it in!
He had come like He’d promised!
In His arms He bore many gifts,
And strangely enough…was that a squirrel on His shoulder?!

The gift exchange was quiet and somber at first.
She offered up shame, and He covered it with righteousness.
She laid down offenses and He filled her with forgiveness.
She showed Him brokenness, and He knit her broken bones back together again.

Bitterness was laid down, along with anger and hate
In their place, the Holy Ghost gave peace, patience and love
He caught each one of her tears in a bottle.
Sin after sin was laid down, and each one He covered with the Blood of Christ.

As she laid down her sorrow,
Curiosity got the better of this dear lady.
In her seriousness before Him she asked,
“What is the deal with the squirrel?”

The Holy Ghost laughed, such a pleasant sound
He held out His hand to where the squirrel ran down to stand
“His name is Mirth,” the Holy replied,
“He’s symbolic you know…for the name Mirth is just another name for joy!”

In all seriousness, my friends
It does not take great discernment
To look around this church
And see the hand of God at work

Friendships mended
Broken hearts becoming whole
Bodies being healed
His glory becoming manifest

Even when the hour is late
And we have grown weary
We can rest assured that we serve a great God
Who neither slumbers nor sleeps

If we could but tarry for a little while longer
Press on a little bit farther
What glories we will see
As the Holy Ghost pours Himself out

What glories will we see?
Rather, whose glory will we see?
Why the very glory of God
The only glory worth seeing.

This Vision I see

2009-06-28T13:39:00.000-04:00

I think this was written sometime in 2004 or 5...the email was dated Feb 2005, but for some reason I think it was written in 2004.

This Vision I See
By: R.A. Slater

What is this that I see?
A vision of Glory come down,
As angels dance all around.
A feat that cannot be pulled of by Man
Can only happen if they stand back to watch the hand of God.
Our cry for revival has rung true,
The church and our nation will become
A royal priesthood ministering to God,
And a nation that serves the Most High.
Revival fire is falling and spreads like wild fire
As people tell of this great God that they serve.
The saints are singing with one voice
As young and old come to know Jesus.
The church rises up from the ashes of desecration
To dance in the presence and glory of God
And is clothed in white garments of holiness.
And the times is now, for the day has arrived –
The thundering is no longer so far in the distance
And the clouds hang overhead instead of sitting on the horizon
The day of Habitation of the Most High God – has begun.

The River

2009-06-26T13:37:00.000-04:00

This one comes from March 2005

The River:
by R.A. Slater

there is a River
flowing with living water
enough to quench the thirst
of you and me
****
so jump on in
saturate
marinate
don't be late
****
revel in His joy
dance in His midst
delight in His presence
and drink deep

Perchance to Dream

2009-06-24T13:35:00.000-04:00

Hmm, this one comes from Feb. 2006

Perchance to Dream
By: R.A. Slater

Sleep tight, you say to me
As we bid farewell
And go our separate ways

Ah, to sleep…
The only reason to sleep
Is perchance to dream

To dream of your touch…
Gentle as it explores
Passionate as it discovers my secret places of pleasure

To dream of your warm embrace…
As though embraced by fire itself
Held by a power greater than gravity

To dream of your passionate kiss…
As one kiss turns into many
And I return your passion with my own

The Sun Still Shines

2009-06-22T13:30:00.002-04:00

This one is from Feb 2004

The Sun Still Shines
By: R.A. Slater

The sun is always shining
Whether on mountain or valley
Even when the mountain blocks the light
When the sky is dark with black clouds
From the storms that come our way
Even when night is fallen
And the heavens are clothed with stars and moon
The sun is still shining just over the horizon
The thing is to keep on moving soaking in what light you can
To plod towards that far horizon
Through woods of peril and storms of strife
During days of weariness and sorrow
With hope ever burning
Sometimes bright, sometimes dim
But always warming the chill in your heart and bones
For though the wind may howl
And the wilderness raise a dreadful clamor
Above it all you can hear Him whisper,
“Press on, my child…I am still with you.”
And though nothing on the outside changes
Hope takes root and turns to expectant faith
That whether on mountain or valley
Through clouds and dark
The Son still shines
And you know that He is still with you.

One Woman Alone

2009-06-20T20:40:00.000-04:00

I was going through some old emails and found this jewel written back in November 2005.

One Woman Alone
By: R.A. Slater

One woman alone
……abandoned……
She stands against the cold
……forgotten……
Braving the wind and the rain
……beaten……
With no one left to hear her
……forsaken……
Whether she lives or dies
……ignored……
No one hears the whispers shouted into the wind
……helpless……

Alone she lies
……rejected……
Beaten, bruised, bleeding
……misused……
Words cut as knives
……misunderstood……
Twisted around and around
……confused……
Till she no longer knows who said what
……wondering……
Or why it matters
……weary……

Alone she drowns
……help me……
Beneath the weight of her sorrow
……can anyone hear me?……
Mocked and ridiculed because of it
……why Lord?……
Tears run down her face as they scold
……Jesus, I’m suffocating……
She surrenders and gives up
……I can’t take it anymore……
As she is at last told that her pain is imagined and unreal
……it hurts Jesus……

One Man alone
……Gethsemane……
Arms wide open
……Nails……
Blood flowing freely
……covering, healing……
Broken heart, tears falling
……love……
Nail scarred hands holding her close
……His heartbeat……
A whispered promise that echoes
……I AM with you, always……

Alone she kneels
……lonely……
In the presence of the only One left
……comfort……
And pours out her heart
……relief……
Lays down her sins
……repentant……
Gives her grievances over to Him
……forgiveness……
Starts over anew
……mercy……

One woman alone
……not alone……
She stands fortified by God’s grace
……forgiven……
Shored up by His strength
……joy……
Armed with the Truth
……His Word……
To face another day
……new mercies……
Not alone

Surprise

2009-05-20T00:58:00.015-04:00

Surprise
By: R.A. Slater

Years of fruitless searching
Had brought me nothing but disappointment
When despair was my best companion
Unfulfilled dreams haunted my waking
And even the hint of hope was dashed
Broken and shattered into pieces
Each shard cutting to the deepest
Until my heart at last gave out
And I laid down, ready to die
Caught in a web of loneliness
Thinking, believing, knowing
I would never find you
You caught me by surprise
And you found me
Your arms held me with fiery passion
Tempered by patient gentleness
Made me believe again
That happiness could be found
With a piece of heaven on this earth
And a piece of the Father's heart
Hidden inside a man
Revealed for me to see
Much to my surprise
And delight
That echoes in two hearts

Gone

2008-07-05T03:17:00.002-04:00

Gone

By: R.A. Slater

07-07-08

Gone are the days of blue haze

The mowers came one day

And cut it all down

They showed no remorse

They showed no regret

Only stisfaction in a job well done

Gone are the days of youth

Gone is our innocence

Now we must trod the path unmarked

We may travel without joy in our bosom

Or hope in our heart

But faith still abides

For though the path is unmarked

Robbed of the delightful blue haze

It is still the same path as before

Tantalize 2

2008-06-27T05:00:00.000-04:00

Tantalize Me {pt 2}
by: R.A. Slater
04-26-08

Once in our secret place
You tantalize me
Your touch is light as a feather
Becoming firmer as I press into you
Teasing me at the edge of my senses
Your fingers trace my face
Running along my cheekbones
Under my chin, caressing my neck
You draw me close to you
Without my being aware
So easily you reached into my world
And drew me away
Pulling me into your own
Where thought stills
And attention is focused on you
On your touch
Your gaze
Your beating heart
Blending somehow with my own
Longing for more of you
Hoping that this moment does not end
But goes on forever

Eclipse

2008-05-08T06:35:00.000-04:00

Inspired by a recent sermon by David Wilkerson that I read entitled "An Eclipse of Faith".

Eclipse

By: R. A. Slater

05-08-08

Why do You hide?

Why do You leave me alone?

Your hand which covered me

Now covers Your face from me

Withholds Your presence

Keeps Your very breathe

Afar off

The barest shimmers

Along the edges of perception

Serve to remind me

Of the past glories

Of how things used to be

Instead of reminding me

That You are not completely gone

My heart cries out for Your return

Even as I deal with the anger

Over Your departure

Not understanding WHY?

Why God?

What did I do to deserve

The absence of You?

Can't You see

What this is doing to me?

How I can't breathe?

How I stumble and fall

Because I can't see

In this diluted darkness

Of this eclipse?

I wish that I could give up

I long to give up

But something keeps prodding me

A faint glimmer of hope perhaps

A last shred of faith

That this too shall pass

That You will return to me

Tantalize 1

2008-04-25T17:45:00.000-04:00

Tantalize {pt 1}
by: R.A. Slater
04-23-08

How you tantalize me
Drawing me on
Tempting me with bits and pieces
Marking the way with delectable morsels
Each one designed to captivate
And hold my attention
As you lead me to your destination
Where we can be together at last
With no one to bother
And no interruptions
So that you can ravish me
At your leisure
Taking your time at exploring me
Pleasuring in my pleasure
This thought draws me on after you
You never waiver
Never let me wander
Keeping our eyes on each other
And the destination
And the as of yet unknown
Ecstasies that await us there
My heart pounds in anticipation
And I hear the echo of this desire
In your voice as you encourage me on

Moonbeam

2008-04-22T03:11:00.000-04:00

A change of pace.....sort of a commerical break maybe? lol!

Moonbeam

by: R.A. Slater

4-17-08

Sleathily I rise above the horizon

Uncurling my luminescent beams

As a flower opens her petals to the sun

Or as a maiden unfurls her hair for her lover

For so I desire to be to you

Stretching forth in my beauty

I long to wake you

Arouse you from your slumber

To caress you with my soft tendrils

Pleasure you with my sweetness

To bathe you with my incandescent glow

Seduce you with my smooth milky white

To feel your hands reaching back

And see the desire in my eyes

Reflected in your own

Pulling closer to each other

No longer existing in distant orbits

But dancing closer and closer

Until we are in the same plane

Will you be there when I wake

Or will it turn out to be a dream

Regardless I display my beauty for you to see

As a maiden slowly disrobes for her lover

For so I long to be to you

Count My Tears

2008-04-19T04:24:00.000-04:00

Count My Tears

by: R.A. Slater

4-19-08

Do You count my tears

Each one as they fall

In a steady stream

As anguish breaks my heart

Yet once again

As I am forgotten

Shoved to the side

And ignored

Do You count my tears

Shed in loneliness and despair

Differently from the other tears

Shed in joy and delight

Though far and few between

Do You keep them in seperate bottles

Or pool them all together

Do You count my tears

That I cause myself

Or consider them deserved

Unworthy of marking

Do You count my tears

Even when they aren't shed

Held in by fear

Of judgement and condemnation

See them now

Dropping, streaming, falling

How can You count

A continuous stream

Sometimes

2008-04-12T04:37:00.000-04:00

Sometimes

by: R.A. Slater

4-12-08

Sometimes I don't know where You are

Looking high and low

Until I am weary and faint

I curl up inside into a tiny ball

The pain of my loss too great to bear

The world bears down on me

Cutting off my will to live

Cutting off the very air I breath

Though my tongue has been silenced

Still my heart cries out to You

Knowing that where ever You are

You always hear each whispered shout

How I miss Your presence

Your arms wrapped around me

Keeping me warm in this cold world

So now I wait...

Sitting here alone and cold

Weary with my crying

Waiting for You to find me again

Weary

2008-04-02T02:23:00.000-04:00

Weary
by: R.A. Slater
April 5, 2008

I am so weary of my life
Of waiting and longing
For open doors that aren't there
Of hoping for things
That never come to pass
Even the windows are solidly locked
I have checked them twice
There is no escape from this dark passage
As I groan beneath the weight of my burden
Trying to scream
In a world of deaf people
I find that I am invisible
No breath of cool air
To bring me relief
No oasis in this darkness
To quench my thirst
Blindly I grope along
Needing to keep moving
If there is a light
At the end of this tunnel
My heart feels that it is far off
And I despair of living long enough
To see it with my own eyes
Instead of imagining it
But I am weary
Unable to keep my chin up any longer
Needing rest
And finding no safe refuge

Burning

2007-09-22T05:50:00.000-04:00

Burning
by: R.A. Slater
09-22-07

I used to be
A brightly burning fire
For You my Lord
Bright and hot
Strong and true
Somewhere along the way
I let the fire dampen
And now I cry out
Lord, burn once again in me!
Burning blazing fire
Holy passion
Pure delight
Scouring
Purging
Enlivening
How I long for that life
Abundant life
To burn in me again
No longer hidden
Fire dripping from my fingers
Oh God, set me and send me
Set me aflame with Your love
And then where shall I run?
Where can I spread this life?
This life giving fire
Passionate delight
Air to the dying
Etnernal Flame
Holy Fire
Consume me
Let me be Your living torch
Here am I

Basking

2007-09-14T04:02:00.000-04:00

Basking
by R.A. Slater
09-14-07

Sometimes life hits hard
Leaving me spinning
First one way and then the other
And I find myself wanting nothing more
Than a chance to sit at Your feet
And bask in Your glory

Brightly shining
Blazing and blinding
Warming the cold of my life
Comforting that which hurts
Seeking You, I find You
Sometimes quickly
Other times not

And we sit
Drawing near to each other
Renewing our communion
Taking me deeper
Burning me deeper
Changing me deeper

And as I bask in Your glory
Knowing You
I become discontent
And I realize
That there are others
In need of You

Desperate
Dying
Thirsting
Longing
Enslaved
And they've never heard Your name

It is not enough to bask
Not enough to reflect Your glory
You must shine from within me
Consuming fire
Burn in me
Consume me

Each time I bask
Soak deeper into me
Then push me to my feet
Set me running to the dying
Lead me, run with me
Dwell in me

Saturate me
Burn in me
All the way
To the core
All the way
I am yours

Light In the Darkness

2007-09-01T06:15:00.000-04:00

Light In The Darkness
By: R.A. Slater
09-01-07

In the darkness I sat
Heart so cold
Lonely and afraid
Too tired to even call Your name
Lord how long must I wait
So long already
Your Voice silent
Here I wait longer still
Unwilling to give up hope
Though hope is gone
Resting...trusting...
Crying...waiting...
Breathing...quietly...
And then...there You are
Softly, gently, a light in the darkness
Your warmth spreading from limb to limb
Melting the coldness of my heart at last
Love renewed, a heart refined
Passion restored, all things new
Then...brightness explodes
Blazing glory
A fiery tornado
Oh how You consume me Jesus
Holy fire rushing through my veins
Not enough...never enough
Always wanting more
This intimacy
This deepness
That deepens
Hunger gone, thirst quenched
But always wanting more and more
Needing more
More of You

Figment 2

2007-08-27T05:00:00.000-04:00

Figment 2

by: R.A. Slater

I awaken as though from a dream

Thinking I've held you near

Having felt your touch

Your voice caressing my ears

But as I push back the covers

The dreams are shattered

Reality sets in

The fog of uncertainty clearing

As my feet hit the cold hard floor

Darkness descends

Cold and hard as mountain bedrock

Traveling through my day

I realize that you were never there

That what we shared

Never existed

Created by my imagination

You turned out to be a figment after all

And I am left alone

Without even the warmth of hope

To wrap my heart in

Words

2007-08-26T10:02:00.000-04:00

Words
By R.A. Slater
08-26-07

Words … words … words
Tumbling around my head
Aching … longing … needing
To find expression
To have a voice
To be heard
How does one describe
A pain this sharp?
Pointed … piercing … pounding
A heart rejected
Tearing … torn … to pieces
Bleeding all over the place
Into every part of life
No facet untouched
Aching … alone … a void
Unseen … unwanted … undone
A heart so lonely
A heart so scared
Frightened and terrified
Shards … seeping … seeking
Broken … bleeding … bruised
This heart of mine
Laid bare for all of you to see
And all I have are words
Which cannot describe
Cannot explain
Cannot fix

Pictures

2007-08-25T05:18:00.000-04:00

Pictures
By R.A. Slater
08-25-07

I put your pictures away
A year ago today
Foolish I was
And foolish I am
Thinking I had found better
Not thinking at all
I got your pictures out today
Looked upon the face I adored
That I adore
Tracing its line with my eyes
Touching the picture
As though it were you
Smiling back at the smile on your face
Missing hearing that smile in your calls
I thought to pick up the phone
To hear your voice again
To let it caress my ears
As though it was my heart
To ask you
To beg you
To take me back
To love me again
But I know that I cannot
For last we spoke
You told me no
Breaking my heart
As I must have broke yours
Poetic justice perhaps
But my how it hurt
Hurts
So once again
I put your pictures away

Treasures Of Darkness

2007-07-09T22:23:00.001-04:00

Treasures Of Darkness

by R.A. Slater

7-9-07

I will give you treasures of darkness

And hidden riches of secret places

So said the Lord one lonely night

Treasures of darkness? I reply

What treasure can there be

In this darkness surrounding me?

Hounding, invading, all encompassing

Until it is all I can see

All that I feel

All I can hear

Every breath I struggle to take

Is saturated with its clinging dripping weight

There are no riches hidden here

In this secret place of my despair

Where I wonder if You're even there

Where I ask if You remember me

Have You heard my cries?

Have You been listening?

Were You there to catch my tears

To store them in Your bottle

Like Your Word says?

I am weary with my crying

Day in and day out

With no sign that You've heard

No sign of Your promised comfort

Where is this hidden treasure

That I have sought after

Groping about in this blinding darkness

And when I paused...

Breathing...Crying...Straining to hear...

Hoping to hear...Longing to hear...needing to hear...

I Am right here, He whispered

By your side

I have never been far

And have held you often

As you shed your tears

Catching each one in My bottle

Just as I promised

For I am a keeper of promises

Which you are still learning

Which is the treasure of this time

Though you do not see it yet

Nor its end

But I do, precious daughter of mine

I see the darkness' end

And its hold on you

And the joy that awaits you

As the darkness shatters all around

My light reflecting off the jagged edges

And you and I shall dance

As never before

Victory in the keeping

What intimacy we have had in this darkness

As the secrets of your heart have been laid bare to Me
For the darkness does not hide you from Me

For where you grope blindly

I have held firmly

What intimacy is yet to come

Once you learn these treasures

And let go of the darkness

And cling to Me

Day And Night

2007-06-28T04:02:00.001-04:00

Day and Night
by: R.A. Slater
6-28-07

Day and night, night and day
There is a clamor that none can hear
Save heaven's ears
The innocent that cry
As their lives are cut short
The silent children
Who never see the light of day
The forsaken ones who are thrown to the side
Living a life or torment and shame
Without ceasing their voice cries out
Without ceasing new voices are added
To the ever increasing throng
How long, O Lord?
Until enough is enough?
Which voice added will be the one,
That spurs Your hand into action?
Is it mine?
Then hear my cry
As I lift my voice
And add it to the cacophony
That reaches Your ears
Day and night, night and day

Wandering

2007-06-22T00:15:00.000-04:00

Wandering
by: R.A.Slater

I feel so lost
As though I wander in circles
Running into invisible walls
That bar my escape from this madness
Who searches for me?
Anyone?
I know of One
Who hunts for me with dogged persistance
I wish He'd find me
Before this wandering
Gets the best of me

Broken Silence

2007-04-19T23:45:00.000-04:00

Background: this is based on what I felt during a brief spring snowstorm early on the 12th. See the poem entitled "Silence" a few posts down.

Broken Silence
by: R.A. Slater
4-12-07

Alone I stood in the storm
The deadening silence echoing around me
Filled with the sounds of falling snow and rain
As a child I lifted my face
To gaze upward in the night
Ever upward
Into the onslaught
Such beauty raining down on me
There was nothing gentle about it
For the snowflakes mingled in the rain
Were heavy and wet
They streaked by me like meteors in the night sky
It was then that I felt You
In this moment made for romance
The snow and rain catching in my hair
Were Your fingers caressing me
Each snowflake, each drop of rain
That pelted my face with wetness
Were Your ardent kisses
Though You said not a word
Letting the tinkling sound of the falling snow
Fill my ears as You filled my heart
In that eternal moment
I knew that the silence
The terrible aching silence
Had been broken

Robin's Psalm II

2007-01-25T08:15:00.000-05:00

Robin's Psalm II

"Clinging"

by: R.A. Slater/1-22-07

The pillars of heaven and earth did shake

And the gates of hell flew open

The forces of evil assaulted me without mercy

And to my shame...I was afraid and I did tremble

I fell beneath the onslaught, neglecting to cry out for help

I cowered in fear and shame, my tears mingling with the falling rain

Beneath my hands as I pounded my fists in anger

I felt the cool wet Rock

Greater than my shame, was the shame I had brought Him

But in my despair, I clung to Him

Knowing Him just well enough to know that He was still there

Still my salvation, still my fortress, still my refuge

I poured out my tears to Him, told him my heart, shared my fears

And I found, that although I fell down

I was not moved as I weathered the storm.

Robin's Psalm

2007-01-22T05:53:00.000-05:00

This one is dated 11-7-98.

It's not bad for a novice.

Robin's Psalm
by: R.A. Slater

Though the pillars of heaven and earth shake
The gates of hell fly open and the forces of evil assault me
I will not be afraid and I will not be shaken
No, I will remain standing and I will stand boldly and bravely
Because the foundation upon which I stand is that Rock that can't be moved
Christ is that Rock
He is my salvation, my fortress, and my refuge
In Him I will stand and not be dismayed
I will weather all storms and not be moved.

Are poems allowed to have 'sequels'? Because as I was typing this up, trying really hard not to "polish" it up, I felt a part two begin to brew. I'm gonna go work on that now, I'll post it later. :)

Fire in the Sky

2007-01-18T09:05:00.000-05:00

Fire In the Sky
by: R.A. Slater
1-18-07

How I long to see Your glory invade my life
As the rising sun stretches its far reaching fingers across the darkened sky
Each ray driving away the darkness
And warming the heartless cold of night
Won't You turn Your face to me
So that my dry and thristy heart
Might drink in Your fiery gaze
To set my ablaze with Your glory
And set me running to tell of Your love
Making me as fire in the sky in someone's darkened night.

Silence

2006-12-10T06:13:00.000-05:00

Silence
By: R.A. Slater
12-10-06

My God, my God
How I long to hear Your voice
Your gentle whisper, a lover’s caress
The thunder of Your glory, a King’s commanding
But when I listen
I fear that I have gone deaf
For all I hear is silence.

All around and about
The world is screaming
Shouting profanities and madness
Chaos beating at me
Turning me in endless circles
Of panic filled confusion.

But inside of me
When I listen for You
Where You used to be
There is only…
…silence.
Maddening…
…deafening…
…suffocating…
…unbearable…
…silence.

I cannot even hear
My heart crying out to You
Pleading for the silence to end
For Your presence to come once again
Beseeching You to come rescue me
From this quiet dungeon
Screaming for someone to help me
Screaming, beseeching, pleading…
Needing this pain to end.

What I would not give
The dreams, the hopes, heart’s desires
Just to hear…
…how I long to hear…
The whisper of Your breath
The gentle pitter-patter, the roaring crescendo
Of the rain of Your presence
For just to hear the rumble
Of that distant thunder
Would give me that hope back again.

Absent

2006-07-09T20:11:00.000-04:00

Hey gang!I'm going to be absent from the blogworld for a while. This goes for all my sites {sorry Bob fans} I just need some time away. If you want to know what I'm up to, email me. {shrug}

Light In The Dark

2006-06-24T04:25:00.000-04:00

A Light In The Dark
By: R.A. Slater
Surrounded by darkness, fear, chaos ...

I look for Your light, a lamp unto my feet ... but I cannot see the source of the light that brightens my path ...

And realize with chagrin, that the light shines from Your presence in me ... Your light in the dark world ...

Caught

2006-06-09T13:45:00.000-04:00

Another old one.

Caught
by: R.A. Slater

How long it has been, Lord,
Since I have stood in the place of Your presence,
Where once we were inseperable.

It has been far too long,
For the memory of Your presence,
Is as a fading shadow in my mind.

You sought to shower me with blessings,
With a love far greater than I have ever known,
But I could not bring myself to trust You.

I could not surrender the very things that hindered,
For great was my unholy and irrational fears,
Of being torn apart and abandoned.

So I wandered far and wide,
Strayed from the path You set me on,
And have come to know the dark wilderness well.

In my pride and arrogance,
I sought to rebel against You,
Foolishly thinking that I could find what You offered elsewhere.

I ranted against heaven,
Poured out my anger and my ugliness,
And was answered with a gentle silence.

You could have thundered in anger and judgment,
You could have rained down hailstones of fire and brimstone,
But You did not.

In Your wisdom You let me rant and rave,
So that I could hear my own words echoing in the silence,
Allowed me to hear my own foolishness.

How small I felt, dirty and naked,
How ashamed of myself I was,
Yet You were never ashamed of me.

I sought to drown in my grief,
Determined to give up on myself,
In a vain attempt to give You permission to give up on me as well.

And You, in Your mercy refused,
Instead You showed Your abundant love,
And pointed me once again to the cross.

Where Love and Forgiveness
Met Sin and Death head on -
And won.

The place where I first met You,
Where we first danced,
Where first I knew Your peace.

There I first tasted freedom,
As I laid my burdens at the foot of the cross,
But it was just a taste, as I did not leave them there.

Your mercy is far greater than my imagination,
Your grace is far stronger than I first understood,
And Your love is more enduring than mine.

For You have shown me a vision greater than shackles and chains,
You have shown me what is possible if I lay my burdens down and leave them down,
And You have promised to help left those very burdens and shackles off of me.

You show me Your gentleness,
Your patience which far outlasts my own,
And You paid the price for my sin with Your own blood.

My fears You have eased,
My spirit You are gentling,
My heart You are winning.

You relentlessly pursued me in my wandering,
And with great gentleness You have caught me in Your strong arms,
And promised to never let go.